Dealing with the same routine over and over again is undeniably stressful at some point. Even a CEO needs a break from the office, what more a mother who lives in the office called home, who wakes up in the middle of the night to rock her nightmared son, and wake up again at 5.30am to prepare for breakfast and lunch boxes that they always running out of idea what to fill them with, to do the laundry, the dishes, the dried leaves and all other stuff that usually takes a mother to her full capacity to keep things in order. And repeat them again tomorrow, and the next day, and next, and next.
While some enjoy being the one that kids rely on to get them covered, others find that motherhood doesn’t come easily. It probably relates to how the mother was raised up with. I don’t know. Maybe.
There are those beautiful ladies who grew up being a big sister to the siblings, take care of their food and clothes, give ways to the adik-adik to enjoy food and pocket money. In short, they are used to putting others first before them. As they approached motherhood, things are relatively easy because they’ve gone through similar routine back then. That’s their life blessings.
Meanwhile, there are also awesome ladies who grew up with whatever they wished for. They’ve got Someone else to do their laundry, to iron their clothes, to prepare lunch and dinner, to wash their school shoes, and even to feed and bathe their pet. And as motherhood welcomes them, there goes the all sorts of awkwardness and stress while trying to figure out which one comes first before what. That’s their very own challenge.
All I’m trying to say is please people, keep your judgement to yourself because mothers don’t need to always listen to her surrounding who keeps telling them what to dos, and not to dos. You know, those looks to mothers who chose to formula fed their baby, those who don’t keep up with their laundry, and those who don’t give organic food to the kids, and worst those who popped their baby just 4 weeks before you and there they are criticising every angle of your motherhood story.
So let’s just avoid living to only people’s expectation because every mother is a great woman who is bearing the heavy title of Mommy that it takes a whole lot of commitment to raise the kids. and so each of you mothers, yes you, who delayed washing the dishes and cleaning up the dining table, are great just the way you are.
Yes, we all need improvements and we are all, too, striving each day to be a better mother without realising that our kids are accepting us they way we are.
I understand the days where you just wish that you had enough of screaming, fighting over the TV remote control, stealing the bigger sister’s colour pencil and not admitting it, poking the baby until she cried the h*ll out of her, and coming into your room in the middle of the night when there’s obviously no space for them.
I understand that.
And here I am, feeling obliged to the whole motherhood community, trying to remind myself before you, that these are all worth it. The mountains of redeemable rewards are available in the hereafter, and these sacrifices of own shopping and spa time, sacrifices of one’s beauty to the scars from pregnancy and C-Section, and sacrifices of one’s career are all worth it when the day that we all enter the Paradise and Allah rewards us with the long awaited pahala.
These are all worth it, as 20 years down the road those kids that come to us crying for a new pair of shoes when they just got one last month are turning out awesome, working in a renowned company with blessed attitude and behaviour. The boys are there, carrying your virtues.
These are all worth it, as 40 years ahead when you are too old to manage yourself, those girls who used to pull each others’ hair each time they fought, are there to cook you great food and accompany you to sleep because you’re still devastated that your husband passed away 5 years ago. The girls are there to support you.
To the mothers who feel like they’ve had enough, it’s alright to feel so.
And it’s also fine to wish for a timeout.
To rejuvenate yourself
To recheck your purpose of life, that is Allah’s acceptance. Mardhatillah.
To gain some strengths from the outside world by learning from the less fortunate ones.
To pick up on your self-worth that has lost its way over the years of motherhood.
It’s alright, because we are all here for each other.
We just don’t instagram, facebook, and pinterest the “downside” of our motherhood stories much. But we still need to be in the club.
Go! Go! Mothers!!